Navigating the Military Base Category

5 Reasons to Download the FindMe Mobile App

Guest Post by Patience Riley of WHOA MAMA Hi Friends! Last week I had the pleasure of co-hosting the virtual launch party for the FindMe mobile app created by fellow military spouse, entrepreneur, and all-around boss chick Jennifer Brantley, Esq. of More than a Mrs. The FindMe mobile app was developed shortly after Mrs. Brantley […]

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All’s Quiet on the Western Front: 28 Things I’ve Learned About Living/Being Stationed in England

All’s been quiet on the Western front…but that’s because More Than a Mrs. has made it to England (and is getting ready to make some noise over here🤪). Here’s a quick, bulleted synopsis of what I’ve learned about being stationed in Europe thus far (some are things I already knew, but they might still be […]

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The Introvert’s Guide to Finding Your Tribe

Making friends at each of your spouse’s new duty stations is already inherently difficult. How can you possibly hope to find your tribe of military spouse friends, when you’re an introvert? The answer, my friends, is quite simple. Just wait to be adopted by an extrovert! But seriously, for many introverts, the prospect of becoming […]

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Community Pool: Friendships, the Milspouse and the Military

What do you do when you feel like you don’t belong?

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Where’s My Community? Making Friends on a Military Base.

Posted on April 12, 2018     Leave a Comment

My spouse is in the military…where’s MY community? Get the answer here.

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Sharing one more photo from my valentine/ #hellospring look, but this post is really about the next photo 👉🏽swipe!
I used to push myself to the limit. Push myself to meet other people’s timelines. To demonstrate, through my work ethic (and often to my own detriment) that I deserved a seat at the table. I apologized for being too big. I felt bad for walking with pep in my stride. I did all that and it STILL wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough. I was hanging my hat with the wrongs things. The wrong people. This past year has allowed me to slowly, gradually, learn to focus on the things and opinions that truly matter. I’ve actually found that list to be very small. And that’s okay. Scaling down allowed me to focus on pouring into myself, so that I could, in turn, pour out more of myself- but into the right people. Have you ever realized that you’ve given too much of yourself, with very little return on investment? How did you shift your energy?
It’s the anniversary of our second #wedding ceremony! I texted my husband “happy anniversary by the way” this morning and he responded with “Huh?” then “Ah“ when I sent him this photo. 🙄😬😂😂😂Ah, military life! Our real marriage date was in July of the previous year (and took place in my living room with the officiant, one witness and my dog before Matt left #atlanta for #nebraska and then Officer Training School) - and that’s the one we celebrate (because I’m claiming ALLLL the years, honey😂). But I will never let a year past that I don’t post about this, in the event another #militarycouple needs the reminder that this is entirely normal, and it’s okay. I certainly wish someone had told me - it would have saved me so much anxiety and stress. We want our family and friends to be there for our special moments, but the #hurryupandwait nature of the armed forces sometimes makes that impossible. So we work with it how we can. 🥰
Sometimes victory looks like being bold enough to dress the extra mile, even though you know everyone else will be wearing jeans. 🤷🏽‍♀️ Have you ever wondered why we get so hung up on other people’s definitions? How’s that working out for you? We try to meet their definition of success and end up miserable. Try to explore their definition of self-care and end up more depleted than when we started. Try to walk in their definition of “boldness” and end feel so uncomfortable that we miss the mark. I don’t know exactly who “they” are for you, but I guarantee they always have something to say. I’m practicing filtering out the noise to walk in my own way. And more often than not, that means taking and celebrating the baby steps - the small wins. What small wins are you working towards this week? 👀
I remember talking to you on the phone when we were dating and muting the phone so I could yell, “Yes!” at God. You’d talk and somehow capture exactly what I was feeling or thinking and my jaw would drop, literally. You never knew it, but I was on the other end mouthing, “What the...” over and over (to nobody) while you kept obliviously talking, because I just couldn’t believe God had seen fit to bless ME with someone who got it so right. Sometimes I even put you on speaker phone, set the phone on the bed, and took a lap around the room. 😂
If you’re not mindful, folks will really have you out here feeling like you aren’t enough. Don’t dim your shine, just because they can’t bear the dazzle. That’s it. That’s the message.
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