An Open Letter from the Milspouse with Two Wedding Anniversaries

February 18. I can’t let this significant day pass without posting this open letter to our friends and family.

So much pressure and stress and love went into the moment pictured – MONTHS of all of the above. This ceremony was already planned and deposits were in hand when we said “I do” a few months earlier in my living room (because “military” and military recruiters) and Matt and I were separated soon after. So, yes, we have two anniversaries.

But looking back now, I’m so glad things worked out the way they did. Shortly after the picture above was taken, my grandmother fell seriously ill and went to be with the Lord. While she was unable to make this official ceremony, she left praying for my marriage and knowing I was in good hands.

We now celebrate that earlier anniversary (for one, because I think in marriage you should claim every single second lol).

But seriously – for me, things really sank in when we said “I do” before our friends and family. So this is an open letter to my family and friends (who were outweighed by my husband’s in number, lol, but not love) – thank you. And to those friends and family of Matt’s who have now become my own – thank you. Thank you all so much for being there and proving that we’re not alone, even in the moments where we feel most distant.

There was so much going on that so many weren’t aware of, but you buoyed us with your love. If you only knew. This, this – YOU made it real.
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If you’re a military significant other – I.e. not yet married and contemplating two ceremonies – know that it’s normal. If you’ve already done the same and are struggling with how things happened – know that that’s NORMAL. I wish I’d known when we were struggling with our decision. And the struggle you’re having internally is also NORMAL. Either way, the people who truly love you WILL understand.

And by the same token, don’t let any recruiter or otherwise rush you or make you feel you’re low on time. Make the decision that’s best for you and you’ll be alright in the end.

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