Milspouse on a Mission: Beauty versus the Beast

“It’s all connected. Your gifts. Your circumstances. Your purpose. Your journey. Your destiny. It’s molding you. Embrace it.” Author Unknown

Krishanna R. Coleman-LeSane, also known as Mrs. Spotsylvania 2019, wears a lot of hats – or, to be more accurate, tiaras. Currently, she’s a manager, director, choreographer, sister, wife and daughter. She is a woman who has sought to establish her own identity, all while supporting her husband and standing amongst the silent ranks of “military wife”. This Milspouse on a Mission is more than a milspouse, though, because instead of remaining silent, she has used the platform afforded by her various titles to bridge the gap and break the stigma typically associated with being a military “dependent”.

We all know the story of Beauty and the Beast. Much like Disney’s version of Belle, there’s so much more to Coleman-LeSane than meets the eye. In this particular story, however, the beauty queen, and milspouse of more than five years, may not have quite fallen in love with the beast that is the military and the public’s perception of military spouses, but she has conquered it – with style, grace, and more than a little grit.

“I stopped asking myself ‘why me?’ and instead switched the rhetoric to ‘why not me?’ I read a powerful statement that resonated with me. It said ‘Stop speaking negatively about yourself or your life, even as a joke. Your spirit does not know the difference.’ I realized that I had spent countless hours, regardless of the accolades I had acquired, speaking negativity into my life. No one was more critical of me or my accomplishments, than me. I realized there was a calling on my life and I would not be able to successfully answer the call if I was tuning it out with negative self talk or self doubt. So, I found the courage to push past it all and go forth towards fulfilling my destiny.”

Instead of allowing work to become an issue, she found a unique route to make her career mobile. As an office manager, Director of Membership for Alpha Lambda Psi Military Spouses Sorority, Incorporated and “pageant queen” Mrs. Coleman-LeSane’s influence isn’t limited to a particular geographical area. Neither is her community service.

That doesn’t mean military life has been without its challenges. “Some challenges I have faced in pursuit of my goals are the ever changing demands and uncertainties of being a milspouse. Questions such as ‘Where will we be? Where is my husband’s next assignment? Is he due for another deployment?'”

And then, of course, there’s the “mom guilt” she experiences as she endeavors to maintain her own identity. “Am I dedicating enough time to my daughter (7) and my son (1)?” she asks.

But the skills Mrs. Coleman-LeSane has found necessary to excel as a pageant queen, have also helped her address these challenges head on. “A pageant queen is a leader and a role model. She is poised, articulate and gracious. She understands that the decisions she makes and how she carries herself publicly directly impacts those around her.” With that understanding, and with the knowledge that she is serving as an example – not only for her children, but also for the community at large – comes peace.

She engages in a lot of prayer and regularly evaluates her time management skills. “I utilize a journal and agenda that help me maximize my time. I prioritize things by due dates and necessity.”

For other military spouses hoping to connect to their dreams, Coleman-LeSane shares the following quote, “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you’ve imagined.” “I would advise milspouses that the first step to achieving “impossible dreams” is believing that you can achieve the impossible,” she continues. “Set a goal. Make a plan and follow through with it. Be kind to yourself and dismiss any and all things that seek to deter you from achieving your goals…Be patient. Remain prayerful and know that when your calling isn’t basic, your battles won’t be either. Stay the course.”

Want to learn more about work/life balance or how to make your own foray into the pageantry world? Connect with Mrs. Spotsylvania via her Facebook page..

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